can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize