I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
