so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
