is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
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