I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Randomize
