you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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