He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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