I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
its not stalking. its research.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
