Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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