i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Randomize
