No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
