Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
