So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
