Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
