Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(954): View more from Florida

Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.

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(773): View more from Illinois

i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?

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(214): View more from Texas

Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.

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(334): View more from Alabama

Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.

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(309): View more from Illinois

I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married

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(732): View more from New Jersey

WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??

(1-732): View more from New Jersey

....surprise!

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