Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize
