dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
