Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
