I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
