? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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