Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize