Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Randomize
