Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
