I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Randomize
