Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Randomize
