So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize
