OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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