Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Randomize
