No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
