I want to stick my p in your. b.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
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