if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
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