Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize
