you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
there is puke in my bra ... again
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
