2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
