Sry I called you an 8
kristin has been a bad kristin
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Randomize
