well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Randomize
