I wanna bring you to show and tell
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
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