ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
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