My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
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