One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
