and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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