apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Found the puke drawer
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
