i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
What a dumb baby whore.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Randomize
