I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
