why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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