the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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