I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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