so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
