Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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