Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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