lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
