SEEEEXXX PLEASE
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
